Eavesdropping

“But I have never heard Margaret sing,“  said an elderly voice plaintively.

I have always wanted to write that sentence at the start of a short story or a novel having once heard it during one of those quiet lulls which the French describe as ”un ange a passé”  (an angel is passing by) in a stuffy restaurant. 

On the ski bus up to Médran I hit the eavesdropping jackpot:

Educated American male voice: “So there I was just outside Versaille with a busload of hungry students so I tell the driver to find a Centre Commercial….Anyway we end up in a Buffalo Bill do you know the chain?”

Companion nods.

“We all order steaks which are fairly good.  The waitress is wearing a Stetson hat and rodeo gear and the place is full of totem poles, you get the idea.  So I see on the menu card there is apple pie with vanilla ice cream.  I say to the waitress, “In America we call that Apple Pie à la Mode,” thinking she might pick up on the irony but she whips the menu card out of my hand and says quite angrily, 

“Ici Monsieur on est en France.”

 

It is a rare American who understands irony.

Later that day I take Lexi to the Creperie du Monde and Lexi, in one of those leaps of maturity that kids have that leave me reeling, asks in a grown up voice when her photo shoot is taking place.  I explain that although the article was commissioned by the Editor of a well-known UK newspaper, it doesn’t appear that he wants it anymore possibly because of the economic downturn or he doesn’t like it, which is a pity because it is a lovely article all about her.  I explain the meaning of the words ”pitch” and ”commissioned”.   At the corner table behind her is a well dressed man reading Monocle magazine.  He looks vaguely familiar but I tend to think that of all handsome men.  When he gets up to leave I see he looks uncannily like the jet setting Editor of Monocle: Tyler Brulé.

Pity he isn’t an eavesdropper.

PS Although Lexi didn’t get her photoshoot the article Magic Journey Made Simple was published on 10.01.09 in The Telegraph.